True Love

By veronica lynn | August 14, 2008

” Our culture has taught us to equate love with gratification- with getting rather than giving, with talking rather than sharing, with being our own persons rather than feeling a oneness with our mates. Therefore, it is not surprising that people go in and out of relationships since the returns are bound to fall short of their expectations.”

- Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

 ” Things are not right because we have failed to folow the guidelines set before us by the Potter who made us, the Savior who died for us, and the Holy Spirit who is there to guide us.” - Diana Hagee, author of ” What Every Woman Wants in a Man”

 ” Empower yourselves with the strength of God to defuse situations that were designed by the enemy to destroy. Surrender to the Lord’s always greater wisdom and discernment.” -Diana Hagee

” Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.” - 3 John 1:2 ( King James Version)

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Diary- July 23, 2008 Seventh Entry

By veronica lynn | July 23, 2008

 ”That can’t eat, can’t sleep, reach for the stars over the fence, World Series kind of love” - Diane Barrows in the film, “It Takes Two.”

A few weeks ago, one of my co-workers said ( about me) to one of our associates:

 “Do you notice how she is glowing and smiling all the time?”

That friend of mine, whom has nicknamed me twitterpated, is not alone in his assessment.

 (Only those who have seen the Disney classic, “ Bambi” will understand the reference.)

My mother claims that my skin has never looked better.

Who knew that she could have cured my teen acne, if only she had let me have a boyfriend back then?

(I kid!)  

Topics: Cupid's Crash Course, Diary of Frank Anna, Dating (or the lack thereof), Uncategorized | No Comments »

After the Meeting

By veronica lynn | July 15, 2008

This is how I pictured it but not at all how it happened.

Sitting in a corner booth, I have forgotten all about the menu in front of me.

Leaning forward in the seat I’ve taken across from theirs, my eyes wide open and sparkling with hopeful anticipation, I am the first to speak.

Speaking so eagerly I almost bounce up and down with each uttered word, I poise the question I’ve waited my entire existence to ask: ” So, what did you think of him.”

” Him” is the boy I had brought home;  the potential boyfriend it took me 25 years to find and present for inspection.

My companions purposefully, playfully keep silent.

 If asked, they could tell how much I remind them of themselves, back when love first awoke and inspired their own young hearts.

They could describe how love grows and testify that love really does  lasts, if allowed.

They remember what it is like to be as full of questions as you are of hope.

But, because they understand that love is only learned through loving, they choose to facilitate my wonder rather than try to explain it.

Instead, their grins beat their words to answering me.

Finally, I know for sure. They like him; they really like him.

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Language Barrier

By veronica lynn | June 19, 2008

I went to the library yesterday, straight from work, and borrowed the book “Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus.” 

Though I have only had time to read the introduction, I already feel immensely comforted.

 FINALLY, somebody gets it- and a man no less!

For the most part, talking to my boyfriend is the most enjoyable part of my day. But there are occasions when dialoging with him feels like an exercise in futility.

Some days, I tell my boyfriend something and, given his utter lack of comprehension of my points and premise, one would guess I was speaking to him in Chinese.

Times like those,  I feel that my chances of successfully making my need known to him is about as good as my odds of correctly specially ordering an item for myself, while in a foreign country.

In that setting, because I do not have a grasp of the language, it would be impossible for me to clarify my very important, very particular request- an extremely frustrating reality.

Worst of all with my boyfriend, the utter lack of success in our conversations is in no way due to a lack of effort on either of our parts.

 I am always very detailed in my explanations.

My boyfriend truly tries to be understanding and is almost always attentive.

 Imagine with me for a minute that I am in China in desperate need of vitamin C. 

 As a foreigner, I do not know the Chinese word for vitamin C and there is no guarantee that either my amateur sketches or hand signals will effectively communicate my desire.

No matter how helpful the person I am speaking to desires to be, they cannot help me if I cannot communicate what it is that I want. 

Water, a blanket, and a bowl of rice- those are all wonderful, useful, and necessary things. But none of those are vitamin C and, therefore, would be a useless substitute.

Total truth be told, there is one inaccuracy in the above illustration.

If it were stranded in China, I would be frantically searching for M&Ms not Vitamin C.

  Still I am sure those of you Readers who are women understand my point.  

I find it so refreshing to visit with women.

Women instinctively understand concepts and emotions which men have to be repeatedly coached through.   

Granted, it is likely equally true that  men have an easier time shooting the breeze with their buddies than they do speaking with women.

  The reason for that is simple: No translation necessary.    

Topics: Cupid's Crash Course, Dating (or the lack thereof) | 1 Comment »

Merge

By veronica lynn | June 18, 2008

When I get off work this afternoon, I am going to the library to borrow “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.”

 I plan to read the book twice- at least. 

 I can honestly say that one of the biggest surprises in my life has been seeing firsthand how DIFFERENT men and women are.  

I don’t remember anyone- parent, teacher, or pastor- emphasizing that ever so crucial point to me when I was growing up.

However, in all my mentors’ defense, I think this is a principle that does not become abundantly evident until one is actually a boyfriend or girlfriend. 

Numerous times, I have casually joked “men are from mars and women are from Venus” or made a third party observation that “it must be a girl/ guy thing”.

Only now, five weeks into my first dating relationship, am I beginning to realize (and feel the effect of)  the total trueness of my words. 

I once read that experience is that thing you get the moment after you need it.

 I can see that being true in the case of Man vs. Woman.

It’s not that males and females are against each other. But in most situations guys have and entirely different case to present than girls. 

I want my boyfriend to call me. He wants me to dress up for him.

Both are authentic needs and valid requests, but which outpouring of affection is more crucial to the success of a relationship?

It depends on who you ask.  

Suffice to say, I have a whole new revelation of and respect for the miracle of ”two becoming one”.

Merging the hearts and minds of a man and a woman is like… is like… I don’t know.

It’s something, that’s for sure.

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How to Handle a Woman

By veronica lynn | May 28, 2008

Excerpts from Kathy Troccoli and Dee Brestin’s Bible study book, “Falling in Love with Jesus from the section Week 1: A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes.”

“When Cinderella sings,” A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes,” females from nine to ninety sigh.

God knows us, He designed us to be uniquely feminine, and He knows how to talk to us.

Each morning He says, “Good morning, Princess” when He causes the sun to rise, and each evening, He says, “Good night. My Beloved” as the sun goes down.

In the musical “Camelot”, King Arthur sings “How to Handle a Woman.”

A very wise old man told him the secret, a secret known to every woman.

What is it?It is to love her. Simply love her.

As a member of the relational sex, we long to be loved, we long to be cherished. God knows this, for He made us.”

I had really needed to read the above passage.

It comforts me greatly to know that the longings of my heart do not make me less of a person. 

On the contrary, my emotions are what make me a woman-   rightly to be cherished and adored.  

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Doctor’s Orders

By veronica lynn | May 28, 2008

Last night at a basketball game, I received a text from my boyfriend, which said, “We’re done.”

It took me a minute to realize that he was referring not to him and me, but to the sports team we both root for.

(Our team had just suffered a dramatic loss in a crucial play off game. I won’t say any more about that, though. It is too painful.)

 

In thinking about the text this morning, I realized that my heart’s panic button is far too easily triggered.

My boyfriend says something and I panic. My boyfriend doesn’t say something and I panic.

He is starting to get annoyed with that.

What I am not sure he or anyone else understands is how long I myself have despised my predisposition to pull away. I do as preemptive measure of protection, often even before I feel it is necessary.

After all, I am no masochist.  And I am certainly not out to torture my boyfriend.

I long for happiness. I just, unfortunately, have a very difficult time letting myself realize it- and for reasons that even I do not fully comprehend.

My boyfriend’s repeated advice to me to” just don’t stress” almost seems like a ridiculously simple solution.

But in all fairness, there is no way of ascertaining the healing quality of a remedy until you try it.

 

About a week and a half ago, back when my beloved basketball team was winning, I was in a gas station, waiting in line at the register.

On the shelf next to me there was a display of jewelry- necklaces, key chains, and bracelets all with real bugs encased in glass.

I have quirky taste in most things and so was fascinated by the accessories.

I chose for myself a necklace with an Australian beetle in it. The bug closely resembles a lady bug- my favorite bug- except that it is brown and tan instead of being black and red.

After I had purchased and put on the necklace, I noticed that on the jewelry packaging was a description of the Australian beetle.

The bug spends its life on a leaf eating, mating, and hiding.

My boyfriend on hearing about the necklace wondered about the bug’s reason for hiding.

I said jokingly that the beetle is likely hiding from all the other bugs that actually have to work for a living.

 

I do not believe in coincidences. I think everything happens for a reason and that there are lessons to be learned in every life experience.

I have suddenly found myself surrounded by new- new relationship, new living situation, new co-workers at work, slightly new hours. I have a lot of new, a lot of excitement, and a lot to adjust to.

 

Much more than just fun fashion, I see my necklace as an intentional gift from God.

It is my very own “no worries” beetle- a very tangible, daily reminder to trust.

 

To me, knowledge is power.

Last summer my mom gave me a Bible study entitled “Falling in Love with Jesus” which is written by Kathy Troccoli and Dee Brestin.

Mom knows I do not do Bible studies and so rarely gives them to me and when she does present me with one; it is rare that I keep it.

I found this particular workbook two days ago, as I was packing up to move.

I had been feeling at a loss but didn’t know which specific Bible passages to turn to for advice.

I had been praying that God would make some sort of structured instruction available to me and quickly, before I got any more overwhelmed.

 

I began reading the book today.

In the introduction, the authors confides:” We pray that your quiet time with the Lord will become a time you will begin to anticipate eagerly because you are receiving  kisses from the King. (A kiss from the King, according to rabbinical tradition, is a living word from Scripture. When a verse leaps out at you and you have the sense that God has spoken personally to you, you have been kissed by the King.)”

 

Thanks for the kiss, Mom!

 

 

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