I sat there staring at the screen as a wave of guilt and gratitude rushed over me. My heart was stirred by what I saw. These poor and desperate people longed for Jesus. They wanted Him. They waited for Him. They rejoiced when they finally saw Him.
After a few seconds, Zack broke the silence. “Well, what did you think, babe?” he asked.
We had just finished watching the first episode of a new and upcoming series called The Chosen. This new show is about the life of Christ through the eyes of the sinners who knew him best. The pilot episode was about Jesus’ birth, shown from the perspective of a poor and injured shepherd boy.
This poor and slightly crippled young man wasn’t valued in his society — not by the Romans or the Jewish leaders.
He was considered worthless.
Of no value. The reality of his hard life was sobering. But even in the midst of great rejection, he was hopeful.
He knew the Messiah would come and offer life to the people. He longed to see Jesus.
As the story unfolded, He was given the greatest gift of all. The angels came to his field to announce the birth of Jesus in Bethlehem! With unspeakable joy, he ran all the way to the stable where Mary, Joseph, and baby Jesus were. With tears streaming down his dirty cheeks, he looked at the tiny baby and smiled. The Messiah has come.
Emmanuel is here.
The final scene faded out with the shepherd boy leaving the stable and exclaiming, “we must tell the world! We must tell the world.”
And that’s right where my mixed feelings of gratitude and guilt come in.
On the one hand, I was feeling overwhelmed with gratitude for the gift of Jesus. He came to this dirty, broken, sin-filled world to save sinners. That is incredible! I am so grateful to Him. But on the other hand, I felt extremely guilty because of how often I don’t have that perspective.
The poor and lowly shepherd boy was excited for Jesus because He saw His need for Jesus. He saw himself as a sinner. One in desperate need of a Savior. His only hope was in Christ.
I walked away from that shepherd boy with some much-needed conviction. I realized that my desire for Jesus is directly tied to how much I think I need Jesus.
For me (and I’m guessing you can relate), I struggle to see my own neediness.
I am often blind to how sinful I am. I can drift into thinking that I’m pretty awesome. That I’m something great. Pharisaical even. And when this happens, I lose sight of how truly needy I am.
And when I lose sight of how needy I am, I quickly lose sight of my much I need Jesus.
You see, Jesus came to this earth to rescue needy sinners. That’s why Jesus Himself said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance” (Luke 5:31-32). Those who love Jesus the most are those who see their need for Him the most.
If I want to be a woman who passionately loves Jesus, I must become a woman who passionately needs Jesus.
I must be more like that lowly shepherd boy.
My pride, anger, selfishness, lust, envy, and laziness should be constant reminders of how sinful I am, and how much I need the transforming power of Christ in my life.
Over the past few days, this has become the focus of my prayer time. I am asking God to change my heart to see my need for Him more clearly. I long to be a woman who sees her need for Jesus.
If you, like me, struggle to see your need for Jesus, I want to encourage you to join me in praying the following prayer:
“Lord, I confess that I am prideful and don’t often see my need for you. I regularly sin and just move on, as if it doesn’t matter. Please forgive me for my pride. For thinking too highly of myself. Open my eyes to see how truly needy I am. I am a desperate sinner in need of Jesus. I need you in my life every day. I need your saving grace and transforming power to change my heart. Help me to love you and treasure you more each day. —Amen.”
In closing, spend a moment praising Jesus through the words of the powerful worship song Lord, I Need You. Listen to it here.
May our hearts join in this song together as we become women who see our need for Jesus more and more each day and glorify Him with our lives.
“Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You.” —credit
I’d love to hear from you below:
- In what ways do you struggle to see your need for Jesus?
- How has Jesus transformed your life so far?
