The string lights in the trees shone brightly on that warm October evening as I eyed the young couples, twirling around and swaying elegantly on the grass. I felt like a character in a romance novel as I listened to the live band play and observed the guys and girls talking and dancing.
Meanwhile, I stood on the sidewalk beside my sister and a friend. I watched intently. I couldn’t help but ask myself when it would be my turn to dance.
When will someone ask me?
Will a guy ever be brave enough?
I couldn’t help but wonder when a guy would even bother to notice me.
Would I live the rest of my life without male attention? To be honest, I have never had a boyfriend or even been on a date. Guys don’t try to flirt with me or use cheesy pickup lines to get my attention. They rarely talk to me, unless it is for a class project or if they are already in a conversation with my friends.
If my life was a movie, I would definitely have had a boyfriend by now. In fact, I would’ve had one when I was thirteen. We would have dated through high school, and we would be attending the same college. He would be hinting at the idea of marriage, and I would be browsing the Internet constantly for wedding ideas. We would be the happiest couple with the most laughter and the sweetest memories.
And we would live happily ever after.
There would be no loneliness, no waiting, and no doubting myself. There would be no more daydreaming about my first date or questioning when my prince would come. There would only be candlelight dinners, walks along the beach, and moonlit dances.
I would never have to stare at the cute guy sitting in front of me in class and wonder if he’d ever get the nerve to ask me out. I would never have to look at another beautiful wedding invitation and ponder when I would get to send mine. I would never have to listen to my friends talk about different guys and ask myself when a guy would want to hang out with me.
All these hypothetical circumstances are fun to think about, but it just leads to discontentment.
Nobody’s life is like a perfect fairytale, and Hollywood always looks better than reality. I know that God could make all of our Cinderella dreams come true if He wanted to. After all, He is powerful enough and strong enough.
But God isn’t in the business of producing fairytales; He’s in the business of producing Christlike hearts — hearts that are dependent on Him. Getting a perfect fairytale life wouldn’t draw us closer to Him. It wouldn’t cause us to seek Him more or love others more deeply. It would just bring happiness — which is a temporary and shallow goal to have.
Cinderella didn’t have to wait very long for Prince Charming to find her after they met at the ball, but she only had temporary happiness. Sure, she got the beautiful castle, the glass slippers, and the ball gown.
But in reality, no one lives like Cinderella. Let’s not be fooled into thinking they do.
We, as single women desiring marriage, shouldn’t expect to marry a perfect husband someday, have a perfect wedding, and live happily ever after. Rather, we should learn to rely on God—His timing, His plan, and His purpose for us. Finding romantic happiness shouldn’t be our goal.
Christ came to give us abundant life — not momentary happiness or Hollywood fantasies. Abundant life is so much deeper, greater, and more meaningful than the life Cinderella had.
As Jesus said, “…I came that they may have life and have it abundantly” (John 10:10 ESV).
Honestly, I don’t know when it will be “my turn” to get married or even have a boyfriend.
It may be five or ten years away. It’s certainly difficult to be patient as I wait, but I have to remember that patience comes from a heart that deeply trusts in God. It’s not wrong to read fairytales, but it is crucial to remember that the perfect lives presented in these books and movies are unrealistic.
Waiting is a difficult part of life, but if we learn to trust God as we wait, we can learn to have the abundant life Christ came to give us. Right now. Right here. Even without a glass slipper.
What do you think?
- In what ways has the fairytale narrative shaped your view of love and marriage? Share with me below!
AUTHOR: Grace M. is a college student, a writer, and a blogger. She enjoys spending time with her family, chatting with friends, and eating sour gummy worms. She writes about the Christian life at Tizzie’s Tidbits.